Well. I decided it would be good for me to start blogging. I've just started a bunch of social media apps (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram) and I'm still trying to get a hang of the hash-tagging and what-nots. I find myself spending aimless amounts of time exploring other peoples postings and being in awe at other peoples lives- be it family lives or business.
I am now 37 years old and I feel like I'm a later bloomer compared to others my age...or even those younger than me. I feel like I should be doing something else in my life. Don't get me wrong, I am soooo blessed with all of the wonderful people in my life, a pleasant steady job (independent work duties, own office- with windows, holidays off, health insurance, amazing coworkers), relatively healthy, working car, healthy-smart-creative daughter, cozy home to live in, but in the pit of my stomach & chest, I feel like there is a pull towards the North-East doing something wonderful and creative. I also believe that there is where I'll meet the person I will spend the rest of my days with. Someone inspiring, perhaps in a creative industry, who will love me completely.
Last night I had a dream that he was standing in my bedroom, but I was pretending to sleep. I don't know why because he was amazing. He was pitching some creative ideas to a group of others and I was just in awe of how wonderful he was ---but I was pretending to sleep instead of approached him and embracing him. I blame the sleeping part on a prior part of my dream that takes place elsewhere, in a beautiful black woman's loft. She was flirting with me and trying to seduce me, but I didn't want to submit, so I pretended to fall asleep on her couch.